Unexpected Blessings

Write 31 Days Day#9

This day has been completely unpredictable. 

There is a certain rhythm to most days. A routine. We wake. Get ready for the day. Do our work, whatever it is. We eat. We interact with family, friends, coworkers. Sure things happen we weren't expecting, but there is still a rhythm.

Not today. 

I was scheduled to work with my best friend today. We are starting a business together and have been working with a client for several weeks. Before we headed off to work, my daughter was coming by to bathe my dog, Millie. I had things I needed to do, wanted to do more than going to work. Such is life.

My best friend calls me every morning to see how I'm doing. She's just that nice. She's been on this roller coaster ride with me for the past couple of years. This morning's call was different. I knew the minute I answered the phone something was wrong. She told me her father had died in the night. And then she broke down. I said all the things you say in that situation. She said we wouldn't be working today. She's pragmatic like that. I told her I'd be on call all day. Whatever she needed. 

Plot twist. 

I didn't have a theme for #write31days. I'm beginning to think God did.

I texted a few friends and made a couple of calls. Then I set about re-organizing my day. I prayed as usual, but with deeper intent for my best friend and her family. I did my devotional. Had my tea and breakfast. My son came to the kitchen and we talked a bit. Then my daughter came to bathe the dog. We talked about the sadness of the day. I made a few more calls for my friend. Sent a few more texts. 

In the midst of all of that sorrow, something beautiful began to happen for me and my kids. The three of us sat around and talked for nearly 3 hours. We talked about everything and nothing. Then I took a shower while my kids kept talking. It's been a difficult time for us, and they needed time together. I was blessed to watch it happen in my home.

After that, my daughter and I went to the grocery store together. It's what we do. And then I cooked dinner for my son and me. 

And I wonder how a day can hold so much sadness and so much beauty at the same time. I'll be helping my dear best friend a lot for the next little while. I started to say I'll be paying her back for all she's done for me, but that's not true. There is no debt. We are friends. It's what we do. And that is the blessing of friendship.

Blessings!

Thy Friend

“Go oft to the house of thy friend, for weeds choke the unused path.”

― Ralph Waldo Emerson

We met in high school. We'd known of each other for years. Our school was doing a production of "Fiddler on the Roof". I don't know how it happened, but suddenly we were always doing things together. Calling one another after school to plan something else to do together.

There was a core group of us. We did everything together -- movies, dinners, plays, grocery runs, choir. We were inseparable. But I trusted her more than anyone else. I could always count on the truth no matter what. 

I graduated and went to college the year before she did. I made new friends. We didn't see each other every day. It was harder to stay connected. 

The next year she followed me to college. She lived on campus. I lived off. I was a history major. She was a business major. We did some things together. I still called her my best friend, but it wasn't the same. 

I met my husband. He didn't like to share me, and I was a people pleaser. I hurt her. But she didn't abandon me. She embraced him even though he saw her as competition.

She helped me with wedding plans and gave me a bridal shower. She was my maid of honor. 

After that we kept in touch, but not the same way. We were there for all the big events. The birth of my daughter. I was in her wedding.  She and her husband helped care for my daughter while I was hospitalized before and after the birth of my son. I celebrated with her at the birth of her daughter. She had a miscarriage and I reached out. I needed her in my life, but I wasn't sure she wanted to be in my life in a deeper way. 

When her son was born, I was at the hospital while she was in labor. I asked if I could be in the delivery room and she was happy for me to stay even asking my opinion on the final name choice. 

We began truly reconnecting, though, when I began remembering the abuse I had suffered as a child. Ten years after the birth of my daughter. And I turned back to that friendship. I asked for her help because I couldn't think of anyone else I trusted enough. I knew I could say to her, "I can't clean my house, and I can't let anyone else see how bad it is." She came and asked questions and listened and never, ever judged me or doubted me. She became my family at that point. The one person I could call no matter what or when. She laughed with me as we realized my addiction to buying lotion and cleaning supplies. She told me what to get rid of when I became overwhelmed with stuff and crap. She counseled me and encouraged me and prayed with me and over me. She listened to all the awfulness and some how stayed and loved me anyway. She reminded me of who I was. 

And now. Now we see each other every week and talk or text almost everyday. I can't imagine my life without her. She is the sister God gave me, and I am blessed beyond all understanding by that gift. We help each other. We listen to whining and call each other on it when it's time to stop. We encourage each other to honor who we are, and to strive to be better at being us. And we laugh. 

There are no weeds on the path to her door anymore. The good news is that those weeds have been pulled and dug out. The path has been renewed.

(to LBB with so much love!)

linking up with Write on Edge

Friendship

We've know each other forever. Our families have been friends for ages. Our fathers work in similar fields. Her brother is the same age as my sister.

It wasn't until high school that you could say we became friends. We both auditioned for a play, and both got cast. Two of my longest lasting friendships came from that show.

She knows everything about me. I can tell her anything and she takes it in stride. She is funny, a little harsh at times, but unendingly loyal. She was my maid of honor at my wedding. She gave me a bridal shower. She and her husband were our kids appointed guardians. She has cooked for me, cleaned for me, sewn for me. She has listened to me whine, complain, cry, scream, and curse.

She still comes to my house and helps me try to organize my life. We are inveterate organizers. Granted she did throw out my husband's paint pans one year. That took a little work to get him past.

The fact of the matter is she is my sister. She is the one I call when I need to talk. She is the one I call when I need to have fun. She is the cruise director of our little bunch.

She and I started crocheting again the same year, so now we sit and crochet and talk about what it will be like when we're in "the home" and can't remember anything. We'll still have fun telling stories from years ago. We'll just think they are new!

Sometimes I think about what my life would be like without her in it. The very thought makes me sad and a little panicky. Next to my husband she is the strongest connection in my life.

She is my soul mate, my confidante, the sister I was meant to have. She is my best friend.

link up at RemembeRED