I prepare for a long weekend getaway. I prepare by making plans, packing my clothes and toiletries. I pack a couple of books and my computer. I take my crocheting, because I take it everywhere.
I prepare for spending a whole weekend with my husband. He is a good man, but sometimes we struggle. I remind myself that my value is not dependent on his perceptions, anymore than his is dependent on mine.
We listen to Christmas music in the car as we drive. He is recuperating from a respiratory infection. I remind myself that his silence is not an indictment of me or anything I've done or not done. He his sick. I like quiet, too, when I am sick.
No one prepared me for the lasting effects of childhood sexual abuse. No one explained that it would sneak up on me in the most delicate of ways. How it would invade even my most precious relationships.
So now I prepare in a different way. I prepare as best as I can for the unexpected. I prepare based on the assumption that there may be difficulties ahead, but those difficulties don't have to stop me from being my authentic self, and from living a life that prepares me for my eternal home.
linking up with Five Minute Friday