Let me begin by saying, I am diametrically opposed to New Year Resolutions. That being said, let me also confess to making them almost every year; breaking them almost every year; and feeling intense guilt as a result almost every year. The concept that changing a digit (or 2) in the year should encourage me to overhaul my entire life, thereby becoming a different (read better) person is preposterous. It's an exciting concept though. New year, new me! Who doesn't want to start over sometimes?
Of course it is flawed reasoning. New year? Well, really only on paper. My dogs don't know anything has changed, nor do they care. True growth and change is gradual. Usually it is painful and only the result of being forced to change, either by some outside force (lose weight or you'll die!) or some inside force that is more painful than continuing on the current path (flashbacks come to mind here).
So for this "new" year, I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing that seems to work. Regular Bible study; regular, moderate exercise; paying attention to what I eat and why (but not TOO much attention); writing; having fun; helping others. And I'm also going to QUIT doing what doesn't work. Beating up on myself; going on guilt trips; second guessing God; eating things I don't want or need just because they're available; trying to solve everyone's problems; taking responsibility for all the world issues. . . Okay, well maybe I won't quit all of those things right away, but I will try to be more mindful of them, and stop those negative messages a little earlier than I usually do.
I wish all of you a lovely new phase in your life. Call it a new year if you want or maybe just a continuation of this thing called life.
Blessings!
Monday, December 28, 2009
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I've been thinking about this too. It seems to me that I love making lists of requirements for myself- "if I was a really strong-good-smart- woman then I'd be able to: blah, blah blah this year."
ReplyDeleteThen it occurred to me that I could do something very scary yet freeing; I could just follow God's leading and submit my life to him, continually. Let him sort out the list, so to speak.
Don't know if I'm brave enough...