2012 Wrap Up

December 31st . . . 

How did this happen? Not really the end of the year as much as the end of the holidays. I've been sick for the past 10 days. Really not the way to spend your holidays let me tell you. Curled up in bed tossing back codeine laced cough syrup and antibiotics that made me feel worse than the disease. No Christmas dinner. Alone in the house while the rest of the family went to celebrate. Then assuming the worst was over and I'd be feeling much better -- NOT. Still stuffy and coughing a week later. 

So what have I learned from this experience? Christmas is just another day in the year. There is no right way to do Christmas. I have an amazing family -- husband, daughter, and son -- who all took up the slack and made sure presents were wrapped and delivered. Important food items were prepared and eaten. And in the midst of it all they kept the kitchen and laundry mostly caught up, all while checking on me, feeding me, getting me drinks, and meds, and just visiting me as I coughed my way through bags of cough drops and boxes of tissues.

Oddly, the other lesson I learned is how much I do for my family. I don't really think I do that much as a rule. Sure I wash clothes and dishes. I prepare meals and do the shopping. I pick up around the house, but somehow it doesn't seem like that much . . . until I couldn't do it. Until they had to handle it all themselves. Perhaps I'm not just taking up space. Perhaps I serve some useful purpose after all. 

So on this last day of 2012 I encourage you to look back at the year and recognize what you do for others. Maybe you already know this, but maybe you're like me, and tend to assume the world would function just fine without you in it. You might be surprised.

Blessings of the new year where we all can find our purpose.

Happy 2012

image from Graphics Fairy

Goodbye, 2011

Saturday is usually poetry day, and I'll admit I tried to find something appropriate. There's Burns or Tennyson or William Cullen Bryant. But none of them spoke to me.


I am no poet, and yet I find myself wanting to say something meaningful at the end of this year. Something that will strike a chord with my readers and me. I just don't know what that would be.


My dh always writes an end/beginning of the year post, and from where I sit, I can never compete. There is such depth and remembrance!


I write because of a need I have. I have been blessed this year that so many of you have read my words, and a few of you have commented. The writing fills a void for me, but it also allows me to tell my history in a public way. I have often commented on the benefit of public disclosure regarding abuse. I have found no greater outlet than here on this blog. The fact that you take the time to read and comment still astounds me. So once more a huge thank you to all of you who read, with a special thanks to those who comment!


I have found new and old outlets this year. Returning to crocheting has been a boon for my spirit, soul and self esteem. I enjoy the process -- something I have a very hard time doing as a rule. I think I am getting pretty good at it. I've sold a few things and love the things I've kept. Perhaps the greatest blessing from crocheting was in the form of a note my dh gave me for Christmas. He went to my local yarn shop to get me some goodies and had a conversation with my favorite worker there.

"Oh, you're Melanie's husband. I just love her. 

She has such a great attitude and she just never

seems to get flustered. 

She finds projects to take on and if she can't 

figure it out, she doesn't get frustrated 

or give up, she just comes in and asks 

for help, and her work is just beautiful. 

She is just a wonderful

person to be around."

I cried when I read this. I didn't get a lot of encouragement growing up. I was often told that I thought too highly of myself. My natural assumption is that I am an annoyance to people -- that they put up with me to provide something, like food, or out of a sense of duty. To have words like these spoken about me by someone who gained nothing by saying them was simply amazing to me. (I hope I am not out of line in sharing this. I find myself wondering if this will be misinterpreted. I hope not!) So to my dh for sharing and Emily for saying these things, a huge thank you.

My prayer for your new year is that it will be filled with real love, real friends and real experiences. That the troubles you face will be manageable and that you will find support from God, family and friends. That your joys will be many, and you will recognize and appreciate them. And that you will find purpose in what you do and realize your value and the gifts we all bring to this world.

Blessings.

Thankful Thursday

It is the Thursday after Christmas and there is much for which to be thankful!

:: good time spent with lots of family

:: reconnecting with an aunt I had been somewhat estranged from for several years

:: the safety of all my family members (even though ds got a ticket for speeding yesterday! Thankfully no one was hurt)

:: a worship service on Christmas day that included worship, laughter, love and Christmas carols

:: time with my children and husband to just be -- enjoying fun things and conversations

:: lunch and conversation with my two besties yesterday

My hope for all of you is that you, too, have had a thankful holiday season thus far, and that we will all increase our thankfulness in the coming year.

Blessings

find more Thankful Thursday at Grace Alone

The Simple Woman's Daybook -- January 4, 2011

FOR TODAY

Outside my window... it is pitch black.

I am thinking... about the promise of the new year. It's like getting a clean slate, even though very little actually changes!

I am thankful for... a good weekend past. Lots of work on the bathroom. Dd quit caffiene cold turkey and it wasn't bad at all. Order is returning to our home. Worship and class (a new one on Contemplative Spirituality) were both very beneficial.

From the learning rooms... it's back to school today. Ds is not impressed!

From the kitchen... re-organization! I am swapping some cabinet contents around; de-cluttering; and re-organizing work areas.

I am wearing... yoga clothes as today is Restorative Yoga class.

I am creating... a new afghan for the family; a couple more scarves; and hopefully completing that fleece poncho I started back in November!

I am going... to yoga and then to the library. I uploaded the goodreads application to my iPod yesterday. Now I'll have my "want to read" list with me when I go!

I am reading... still The Supernaturalist by Eoin Colfer, hence the planned trip to the library. I'm really bored with this, but I am loathe to not finish it.

I am hoping... to do laundry this afternoon. It seems as if I have fallen off the laundry wagon in the past week!

I am hearing... ds getting ready for school.

Around the house... dh has made so much progress on the bathroom! I can't wait for you all to see it.

One of my favorite things... is fresh starts.

A few plans for the rest of the week... back to school, back to Beth Moore class, back to Precepts class, and I started The Bible in 90 Days yesterday!

Here is a  picture for thought I am sharing... 

The beautiful tile work dh finished this weekend.

Hosted by The Simple Woman's Daybook

A Guest Post from the Dh

I'll turn 48 this year. Sam will be a senior at Lipscomb High School and Claire will start her junior year at Lipscomb College.

Melanie and I have been married 25 year and I've been working at the same job for nearly 21 years. If I'm not old, I'm surely middle aged and maybe a little more...lol.

The earth has revolved around the sun over 2010 times since the birth of our Lord (depending on when you actually place his birth . . . sometime between 3 and 6 BC if I remember my Bible classes).

Each time the earth rotates around the sun another time, we celebrate our victories and mourn our losses. I lost my mom 22 years ago, my grand dad 38 years ago, and my friend Bob almost 3 years ago.

I watched Claire graduate from Mercy this year, which has been the greatest blessing I could have ever asked for her. I've watched her grow and heal and it's been wonderful.

I still have a job and these days that's certainly something to be thankful for, and a Godly wife who loves me more than I deserve.

Sam is just fun to have around and is making really good progress in school. He's dating Samantha and they're already talking about maybe getting married one day (wow!). He struggles with his faith, but I pray he will find that religion is not from God. Christ is. What the world needs is a relationship with a healing savior. Unfortunately, religion often gets in the way (did I mention the crusades...lol).

Anyway, on this January 1, 2011, I squat in my chair (because I still can't sit) but I'm thankful that I can squat because standing is tiresome and makes my feet hurt and I'm thankful I'm learning to sit Indian style again. Maybe my butt will heal this year or I'll get some shots. Anyway, its a minor inconvenience.

It's dark outside and has obviously been raining. I wonder what God has out there for me this year. I wonder how many more times the earth will rotate around the sun before the Son comes back to claim the victory and we will find an eternal home. I wonder what heaven is like. 

I don't know what heaven will be like and its hard to believe in something you can't imagine. I read The Shack this year and I imagine God's love is what will be at the center of heaven, so maybe the particulars don't matter so much; only I'd really like to get a little better idea of things there. I mean, is there really no marriage (so no sex). That seems terrible depressing, but then again, I'm sure it won't be depressing. It will be wonderful. I just can't imagine it.

Well, however many more times the earth rotates or however more days God gives me breath on this earth, I hope you will find the Love of God in Christ to be more important than any of the temporary problems we have to deal with and joy will grow in your life and blow a calm air of contentment and peace over your heart each day.

I want to do a good deed each day but some days it's just not enough. I want to know what I'll be doing in 5 years, 10 years, 40 years. I want a plan. I guess God has a plan. I just don't get to see all of it and I guess that's OK.

Let us all pray more this year. Let us all read the Bible a little more this year. Let's all love each other a little more this year and by all means lets all take more opportunities to say thank you this year.

There's no better way to let love grow in your heart and the hearts of those around you then to express a little gratitude. I haven't read this book but heard the author interviewed on NPR so its definitely on my reading list this year: 365 Thank Yous.

So, if you read this. Thank you. If you commented on any of my posts this year. Thank you. If you prayed for me or for Melanie or for my kids. Thank you.

May this year be a blessing for you and yours and may your heart be filled with thankfulness each day.

God bless you.

Your friend and fellow traveler,

A