Red

Red was my favorite color when I was growing up. It showed up in so much of my clothing and accessories. But as I've gotten older and struggled with lost and retrieved memories the joy of red has become tainted with reminders of the terror of red.

Recently I went through an experience that reminded me far too much of the pain and suffering of childhood abuse. Similar pain from episodes of abuse. And I found myself crying and trying to remember to breathe. Trying to remember it wasn't happening again. That I was in control and the pain was only temporary. 

Red is the color of Christmas and Valentine's, but it's also the color of blood hidden from everyone. The color of panic and fear.

So while I had a period of time where red was totally off limits for me, I'm trying to slowly let it back in, but always mixed with other colors. My chakra bracelet 

my crochet basket 

my favorite tea cup

Because I want to remember the good red without it always being a reminder of the bad.


linking up with 5 Minute Friday