So that was how he organized this situation in his head? She was “sick”. She looked up the definition of sick -- mentally, morally, or emotionally deranged, corrupt, or unsound. Really?
Well at least she knew where she stood with him now. She was enraged by those small sentences. What was it about that one comment? The anger poured from her in a palpable current.
link up at Red Writing Hood
Great use of the active throughout! It really grounds us in your narrators thoughts: makes it very present!
ReplyDeleteOne thing - over at WoE, your link takes you not to this page, but back to the main WOE page. I found you because you commented on my blog, not through the site!
Yes, you may want to "relink". I had to locate you through a creative channel as well.
ReplyDeleteI think you did an excellent job with the anger. It's not easy keeping something so cerebral fluid and moving. Fantastic job!
Nice job. The anger and indignation was conveyed perfectly.
ReplyDeleteThe active voice and the litany of negative connotation are a powerful combination!
ReplyDeleteThanks for relinking. I sorted out your other one, so no worries.
Thank you!
DeleteWords are so devastating, aren't they? Great job showing that here!
ReplyDelete