I was abused as a child. Not by my parents, but it's created some incredible tension in our relationship.
Yesterday I had lunch in a local diner, and as I was leaving I ran into a minister from our church. He was having lunch with someone who's recently moved to our city to work in adoption ministry.
I was making casual conversation and mentioned that my brother was adopted. One thing led to another and my dad's name was mentioned. The newbie knew my dad. The minister, who knows my story, got that "a-ha" deer in the headlight look, and I started to panic. The minister knows my dad.
We were having one of those conversations with our eyes, while the newbie rattled on about how great my dad was and memories he had of him. I said something inane like, "Yeah, I get that a lot" and excused myself.
By the time I got to my car I was shaking, and I couldn't even figure out why. Then it dawned on me. I have a lot of respect for this minister. My husband and I work closely with him at our church. If he knows my dad will that alter his opinion of me? Will he choose to see me in the same light my dad does? Will he think less of me because of things I have shared about my difficult family relationship? Will he choose "their side" over mine now that he's put 2 and 2 together?
So I called him and posed this situation to him. He assured me that it doesn't change his opinion of me. I believe him . . . mostly.
Family complications.
linking up at Writer's Workshop
