Taming the Holiday Angst

I'm trying something new this holiday season. I'm taking care of myself, asking for help, and accepting when help is offered.

The holidays are rough for a lot of people, and that includes me. I don't have a Norman Rockwell family situation. I have struggle, obligation, guilt, and dysfunction. As a friend with similar issues said recently, "I'd be happy to stay on the couch from October through December just to avoid the drama". I feel her pain.

So this year I'm taking a new approach. I bought Mandy Steward's Advent calendar for self-care. It's full of daily reminders to be intentional in our care for ourselves as we are caring for others.

I've also collected a variety of Groupons over the past few months to use for myself -- massage, mani/pedi, a restaurant to try, and a trip to a pottery studio.

I'm buying fewer gifts with more intention. My goal is to purchase only  for those I want to purchase for, and to make those gifts meaningful to those people. That's something that's gotten lost for me over the past few years. I want to reclaim it.

More importantly, I'm going to honor what I feel about Christmas. I am going to make it about what is important to me, my husband, and kids. That's it. No Martha Stewart angst. No comparison to what everyone else is doing (or says they are doing). No setting myself up to get hurt. I will honor this holiday as the holy day I choose to see it as.

Will you join me in this? Are you already doing this? Share some of your ideas.

Blessings.

linking up at imperfect prose on thursdays

happy things

:: flannel gnome sheets
:: freshly ironed vintage handkerchiefs
:: a good book
:: clean, folded laundry
:: tea table with guests
:: take out for dinner
:: freshly lit Christmas tree
:: ebook download
:: Sonic diet cherry limeade
:: a fresh reminder shared from new friends

How's your week going? Anything particularly happy? Sometimes it's just the little things. 

linking up with inner pickle

Wordless Wednesday -- Oh Christmas Tree

for more images go to Wordless Wednesday

The Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY . . . November 27, 2012

Outside my window . . . it's gray and cloudy. The temperature is 41 degrees and it's not supposed to go up much today. 

I am thinking . . . about this verse from last night's meeting:

He heals the brokenhearted

and binds up their wounds.

Ps. 147:3

That is a hands-on physician, father, and God.

I am thankful . . . for the group of survivors I met with last night. It was uplifting to sit with a group of women who understand my struggles in a uniquely personal way. 

In the kitchen . . . last night was scrounging. Soup and sandwiches or a bowl of cereal. I'm not sure about tonight. I haven't made my menu list for this week and that always makes dinner time more interesting.

I am wearing . . . a big t-shirt and my flannel robe.

I am creating . . . still working on that hat! I didn't get as much done last week as I had hoped, but I still like it and it's shaping up well.

I am going . . . to work around the house again today. I'm hoping to get started on the decorating by this afternoon.

I am wondering . . . how holidays became so obligatory instead of joyful.

I am reading . . . Skyjack: The Hunt for D.B. Cooper by Geoffrey Gray. I was just a kid when this occurred but it's always fascinated me.

I am looking forward to . . . heading off for a week in Florida with dh!

I am hearing . . . Christmas carols: Amy Grant, Bing Crosby, Nat King Cole.

Around the house . . . the chaos that precedes decorating, and the chaos (and blessing) of a dh who can replace the vent fan in my bathroom.

I am pondering . . . how to get everything done this week to my satisfaction. I have lots of regular things to do + holiday decorating + some things I want to do. It's going to be a balancing act.

One of my favorite things . . . is having a productive day. Yesterday was a one of those. I'm hoping for 2 in a row : )

A few plans for the rest of the week . . . appointment tomorrow, company Thursday night, meeting on Friday, and heading to Florida on Saturday.

Here is a picture for thought I am sharing . . . 

 I don't look this elegant running holiday errands!

for more visit The Simple Woman's Daybook

Christmas Grumbling

It is officially the Christmas season. Thanksgiving is behind us -- it barely gets a day anymore. 

I love what the Christmas season use to mean. Decorations and parties that didn't appear until December. Caroling for neighbors followed by hot chocolate and donuts. Watching "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" and "The Little Drummer Boy" because it was the only time you could see them.

Here in Nashville a trip downtown to see the window displays at Harvey's and Cain Sloan. And of course a trip to see Santa and share my wish list (which had been made using the Sears & Roebuck Christmas catalog).

Gifts that were picked out with love and a personal interest in what each individual might need or really, really want. There were no gift cards and we never returned gifts because that would be ungrateful.

I don't know maybe I'm just feeling nostalgic and maybe I have convenient memories of the way things used to be. After all I do remember our inflatable Rudolph melting on the spinning wheel of color that spot lighted our aluminum Christmas tree.

But I still miss paper chains, and popcorn and cranberries strung to hang on the tree. And oranges covered in cloves and strung from ribbons. 

What I really want this Christmas is peace and quiet; love and understanding; kindness and compassion; and peace on earth.

That's not asking too much is it?

{this moment}

A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

Five Minute Friday: Gratitude

Gratitude. It's one of my favorite words, and Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

Because it's not about presents or egg hunts or costumes or candy. It's about stopping and thinking about what's good in my life. It's about recognizing what acknowledging thankfulness does for my life.

It's also about family. Over the past few years, family's been a tough thing for me. But last year and this year we traveled to my husband's cousin's home and I have found a happy place to be grateful. The food is delicious of course, but what's really important to me is how we all work together happily to make it happen. How we are relaxed and at ease with one another. There doesn't seem to be a subtext that I can't follow. 

We are who we are in our jeans and t-shirts and flannel shirts. We are loud and boisterous. We are a family who loves one another warts and all. And we laugh.

Bountiful gratitude.

linking up at Five Minute Friday