Thankful Thursday -- Borrowed Thankfulness

It's not that I'm not thankful this morning. I'm just having a difficult time focusing and finding my way to a place of thankfulness.

I know I am blessed beyond all reason. I know that God loves me as His own child. I know that He will always care for me. I know that I have wonderful people in my life, brought by God, to help me see Him more clearly. BUT, I also know that the abuse I suffered frequently replays in my head, and I am overcome with sadness and regret that it happened. I am overcome with the realization that that little girl is me. Those things didn't happen to a random "someone". I would and do feel immense sympathy and compassion for all who suffer any form of abuse, and it is my deepest desire that the abuse cycle be broken.

Sometimes, though, I am simply overcome with my own story. I tend to keep it in the third person, referring to myself during those episodes as "she". It is too painful to own it thoroughly. I don't want any of the episodes to have occurred. I know they are part of who I am; I have learned lessons through them; I have grown exponentially because of the work I have done in processing those experiences. Some days, though, I'd rather not have learned those lessons and grown. Some days I just want a happy, shallow, mindless world to live in -- a Norman Rockwell painting -- where I am happy and trouble free, and so is everyone else. 

But that is not real life. So I talk and I write. I pray and I read. And I reach for that contentment that Paul shares.

I have learned to be satisfied with what I have and with whatever happens. I know how to live when I am poor and when I have plenty. I have learned the secret of how to live through any kind of situation—when I have enough to eat or when I am hungry, when I have everything I need or when I have nothing. Christ is the one who gives me the strength I need to do whatever I must do. (Philippians 4:11b-13 -- The Message)

So for today I will strive to be content with borrowing Paul's thankfulness, until I find my own again.

find more Thankful Thursday at Grace Alone

Thankful Thursday . . . Contentment

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. -- Philippians 4:12-13


Finding contentment regardless of my current situations is a tough lesson for me. Thankful Thursday helps me to focus on what is really important in life.


I keep this list on my refrigerator to help me stay focused especially when the past seems to try to overtake me. I hope it helps you too.

What Is Really Important in Life?

To love and be loved

To appreciate the good and survive the bad

Not grades or weight or possessions

People are what count

Love, kindness, compassion

Peace

Visit Women Taking a Stand for more lists of gratitude. I hope your day is filled with gratitude and love.